Here’s a truly scary thought: Imagine for a moment that three airlines you can’t stand the most because their service is non-existant,their flights are late,their flight attendants are mean,their planes are old and dirty,their fares keep rising,their crew morale is low and their bathrooms smell, decided to even think about merging into one giant airline whose service would be non-existant,whose flights would be late,whose flight attendants would be mean,whose planes would be old and dirty,whose fares would keep rising, whose crew morale would be even lower and whose bathrooms would stink more?

Pretty bad,right?

Well, hold on to your barf bags cause our wings are picking up ice.

Delta Airlines reportedly wants to begin formal merger talks with both Northwest and United Airlines-according to the Wall Street Journal.

 Not totally clear whether this means Delta wants to go to bed with one of the two or have three way.

Either way, guess who gets f–ked?  Too easy,uh?

Talk about a perfect storm. 

Maybe this new,proposed,giant airline would offer just one giant fare…say, half a million round-trip to anywhere? You’d go for that,wouldn’t you?

Even the thought of these three relics from the last century being in the same room talking about a merger bring on a sickening feeling similiar to downing five dozen ballpark hot dogs in five minutes while gulping down six bottles of warm locally brewed beer.

And, what about those frequent flyer miles? Which ones would you use? Maybe the new,giant airline would just get rid of them? After all, it would be able to do anything it wants to do.

Here’s a suggestion: Maybe Delta and Northwest and United could merge with Greyhound Bus. Then, they would have buses that are dirty,  drivers who’d be deranged, fares that would keep going up and bathrooms that would stink.

Only, passengers would be able to get out and rent a car.